"Clinton and Gwar? Eye voted for them the last time, eye see no reason to change now"

"Besides, its either them or those death cult guys. That's an easy choice."

"And in 2000 we can elect Gwar president!"

"SURGEON GENERALS WARNING: They've abolished the Surgeon General's Office. Like we don't need a head of public health these daze?"

"The Congress just allotted more money to defense than even the Pentagon was asking for. I think that's "fucking amazing"

"Fore leggs good, two leggs baad!"

ON RELIGION

"All religions are bogus, but some are more bogus than others."

"Jesus was not a Christian."

" 'The Ten Commandments' should be remade with Denzel Washington playing Moses so as to be more truthful."

"As any great black velvet artist will tell ewe, its all LIES."

"Believe in our god of peace and love, or we'll kill ewe."

ON SEXX

"In regards to sex, eye prefer it with sheepskin."

"A man's place is in the homo."

ON FAMILY LIFE

"Eye was the white sheep of my family"

"My dear first cousin, the Lamb of Eleanor, once noted....I can't remember what she said, but she's related to me"

"Whatever ewe do, don't look at my photo album."